The Best Funny White Elephant Gifts Under $25 (That People Will Actually Steal)

Let’s be honest: 90% of White Elephant gifts end up in the office breakroom or regifted to a cousin you barely tolerate. Nobody is fighting to steal another scented candle, a novelty mug, or a mini waffle maker.

If you want to bring the gift that actually starts a war during your holiday gift exchange—without spending more than $25—here are the top funny, unfiltered, and ridiculously steal-worthy White Elephant gifts from MilkToast Brands.

1. The Original Offensive Crayons ($11.99)

The legend that started it all. Each box of Original Offensive Crayons comes packed with 24 gloriously inappropriate, non-toxic crayons stamped with color names you won’t believe a factory allowed us to print (like Privilege, Gerber, and Insufferable Vegan). Want to level up? Pair it with our Holiday Edition Offensive Crayons ($11.99) so your holiday party gets festive in the worst possible way.

2. Pen Bundle Pack: Offensive + Demotivational Pens ($23.99)

Why give one set of sarcastic pens when you can stay right under a $25 White Elephant budget with two? Our Pen Bundle Pack ($23.99) includes both our best-selling Offensive Pens and Demotivational Pens (featuring classics like "You can be replaced" and "Failure is always an option"). They write smoothly, look professional from five feet away, and deliver maximum chaos up close.

3. Offensive Colored Pencils — 48-Piece Set ($16.99)

For the adult coloring book enthusiast with a dark sense of humor, our Offensive Colored Pencils ($16.99) come pre-sharpened with 48 outrageous color names (Blue Waffle, Barely Legal Lime, Mentally Ill Mango, Back to the Fuchsia) and a built-in sharpener. Toss in the "Happy Little Dictators" Adult Coloring Book ($8.99) and you have a $25.98 combo that will get stolen three times before the round ends.

4. The Toaster Bath Bomb ($12.99)

Need something darkly hilarious for the friend who survives on espresso and existential dread? Our Toaster Bath Bomb ($12.99) is shaped like a retro two-slice toaster, smells amazing, and turns bathwater into a relaxing soak—minus the electrocution.

5. Skip the Wrapping Paper: Snarky & Profanity Gift Bag Sets ($16.99)

Half the comedy of a great White Elephant gift is the presentation. Instead of fighting with Scotch tape at 11 PM, drop your gift into one of our Snarky Gift Bag Sets ($16.99 for 5 bags) or the Funny Profanity Gift Bag Set ($16.99 for 5 bags) featuring bold kraft bags like "Don’t get your hopes up", "Literally the least I could do", and "Here’s your f*cking gift."

Bonus: Go Big With All 6 Editions ($28.38)

If your gift exchange has a $30 cap—or you want six instant stocking stuffers in one click—grab ALL 6 Editions: Offensive Crayons ($28.38), including the Original, Holiday, Offensive-ISH, Pot Pack, Red White & F*ck You, and Porn Pack editions. Plus, the more you buy across our store, the more you automatically save at checkout!